nothing restrained me like your leather grip 
on your slate bed covered with aquamarine 
mountain to sea I went on all fours cuffed 
like a childdoganimal no 
like love 
& you wrote a shatakam for me 
        erotic collides with you the divine 
        you write I comply 
that’s what you said about me -- lovebird lovefeast 
come when I call you I came when you called me 
not that I minded but 
sometimes I minded 
rub & suck of teeth on my thumb 
fingers in my mouth missing you 
by the Prajapati    by the Yamuna 
by the Ganges on a wet stone step at Holi 
& purple rain comes flying from tin cans 
a hundred stanzas 
the myriad colors of this holiday paint 
your purple cheek    red hair    blue arms 
green & gold     pink & cream     saris drenched & blooming 
festival colors at festival hours 
you rub me down 300 verses model lover devoted nurse dancer 
        showgirl doll 
on location    Himachal Pradesh     Andhra    Kerala     Kashmir 
 

your face on my lips 
who would have thought I’d write a shatakam for you 
no one thought I could write of political kingdoms 
a hundred states in the days of rival kings 
thus the trains     empirical     the army 
one under god our nation split 
my lips parted 
in a wet haul 
in a rainy season 
Krishna so much calamity & love lost 
as of late & long before 1947 
though endowed you could not quell border disputes 
found me in a field like the shoe of an ancient woman 
who’d given all her teagardens away 
 

I was ready for fate     prepared myself Krishna 
I have a handle on myth’s dreams of me 
set myself on fire at the death of no spouse 
but land I love 
my nation 
sacrificed am proof 
of a home’s infinite worth 
though you need to think I burnt myself for you 
minuscule statue by the burning tall centuries 
 

between love games your shatakam explains 
garlands burst on crushed sheets 
flesh in my mouth swollen lower lip 
count them ninety-eight     ninety-nine 
you came your face on my lips 
 

a hundred stanzas equals one drop of my witness 
to the south to the north it goes on shrinking 
& the east-west fences 
Pakistan     Bangladesh 
fighting goes on for riverwater 
we witness our fractions 
though we all suffered we had to stop & marvel 
sometimes at night the guns quit in every quarter 
sometimes love came I wanted the heave I did though I have changed 
your shatakams they did not reveal me 
 

love it is here or nowhere else we can name 
let this be my-only-life 
let this be best-lived 
putdownarms dissolve men’s penitentiaries 
fencing sex rank race class caste 
tongue on my lips 
tell me why & I ask why I let 
your buckled leather grip arrest me always 
contain me restrain me retain me. . . Give it up 
the shackle ninety-nine a hundred love I will try to show you 
my shatakam beyond erotic beyond divine but alert & current 
under the old locks tiers of them & I can newly choose 
my own lover in my own way 
the cheerful fearless seer to near me with his insides 
lit & clarified